I get it. The Obamas are hot. Unbelievably, unspeakably, irretrievably hot. So hot they make you wonder about your own marriage. So hot they must be having the sexytime constantly in the White House because, as we all know, sexytime? Hot. The hotness. Even Paris Hilton agrees. And thank God such a hot guy with such a hot wife has his finger on the button, ’cause God knows, if he ain’t getting the BJs or the PIV, he’s gonna be antsy, ladies, AMIRITE???
During the primaries Obama fanatics supporters were known to take great offense when Clintonistas Hillary supporters would suggest that at times, their support for Obama appeared to have sexual overtones. I, of course, can’t imagine how anyone could have that impression, especially now that we’ve swept those deluded old white women aside in favour of our serious policy-based admiration of the man. Or that we’ve made apologies for the relentlessly frattish nature of most of Obama’s white-dude supporters – including his speechwriter – in the name of harmless frat-boy fun! And games! Did I mention the close correlation between fun and hot and also the sexytime, recently?
We over here at the No-Fun-According-to-Feminism committee, however, wish to point out that we think nothing further need be said on this subject. White America need not continue to sexualize its (frankly creepy!) attraction to Obama. It need not continue to discuss Michelle as either a potential National Brood Mare or National Grateful Recipient of Peen Joy *wink wink*. For starters, it is a completely and utterly vapid way of talking about the person who actually leads this country and with actually have to make actual tough decisions about actual matters. It is ridiculous to assume that virility has any bearing on anyone’s character, male or female, and even more so on his or her policy positions. It is sexist talk because it defines people by how much (presumably PIV) sex one is having. And it is, over and above all these things, pretty damn racist to natter on and on about the sexuality of a black man in a culture that has always had way too prurient of an interest in, well, the myth of the hyper-sexuality of black people.
To paraphrase James Wolcott, if you must, you can continue to cut out heart-shaped valentines to Obama and paste them in your locker. But kindly stop kidding yourself that your individual sexual attraction to the man has or should have any place whatsoever in the national conversation. And no, it’s not appropriate, Nerve, even in the context of sex education, to backwash your article on sex education with random observations about the Obamas’ sex life. Your awareness of the issues attendant to sexual health has ZERO CORRELATION to how much sex you and your partner are or are not having. Having a ton of sex does not mean you will consistently use condoms; having no sex doesn’t mean you will either.
So please, for the love of all that is good and holy, people. Cut that shit out.
Thanks to Samhita at Feministing for directing me to the Nerve article that inspired me to anger.