Comments on: On Strange Bedfellows (Or, Some Questions About Alliances)

By: » Some Help From Twisty on Allies The Pursuit of Harpyness

» Some Help From Twisty on Allies The Pursuit of Harpyness — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 20:00:40 +0000

[...] when he tried to call himself a “reluctant feminist.” And then there was our own little run-in with Eileen Calder, who thought we were crucifying her by suggesting that a burlesque dancer might not be the most [...]

By: » O’Really? The Pursuit of Harpyness

» O’Really? The Pursuit of Harpyness — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 15:04:05 +0000

[...] was that I was just saying about strange bedfellows? Oh, right, before our conversation got derailed, I was saying something about having a tinge of [...]

By: BeckySharper

BeckySharper — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 00:16:28 +0000

@Caro: Did you read what she wrote to us? She showed no respect. She was drunk, belligerant and attacked us in every personally vile way she could think of. Frankly, we probably shouldn’t have allowed the comment through, as it was cruel, aggressive and demeaning to us. I’m sorry you didn’t like our response–I’m not particularly proud of it either–but you’re blaming the victim here.

By: Caro K

Caro K — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 23:57:21 +0000

Wow, I must say, coming to this very late, that I’m rather horrified at the turn this thread took. That “Erin go bragh” made me cringe–I can hardly believe that it came from a Harpy I’m just starting to trust. Eileen, however defensive and angry, should have been met with dialogue and a modicum of respect here of all places. In a post about alliances, of all places.

The internet is a dangerous tool, and I’d say it just claimed a few more victims. Be careful out there, folks.

By: BeckySharper

BeckySharper — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 03:10:19 +0000

@Aunti: You’re right of course. No one should ever make attacks on someone purely for their nationality.

Bear in mind, though, that Eileen chose to come in here, ranting and raving, cussing, semi-coherent, spewing vitriol and making personal attacks on our culture, our nationality, our level of education, our sexuality and just about everything else she could think of. She may have been personally involved in the story, but she behaved like a generic sicko internet troll. I hope you’d have some criticism for her as well.

I don’t think we’re under any obligation to ally ourselves with someone whose approach is so hostile, irrational and ugly. Thanks, but no thanks. I don’t need allies like that, no matter what the cause.

By: Pilgrim Soul

Pilgrim Soul — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 01:46:49 +0000

I agree, Aunti Disestablishmentarian, although in general this exchange has made me despair of any shot at an alliance if any critique is going to be taken this… strongly? Does alliance mean suppressing my actual disagreements for fear of offending someone?

By: Aunti Disestablishmentarian

Aunti Disestablishmentarian — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 01:00:30 +0000

Badly done, Becky. Very badly done.

Fire with fire just increases the flames until it gets too hot for everyone, and anti-any ethnicity/demographic is never OK, no matter who hit first, right?

If this thread is going to live on, perhaps we can get back to matter of alliance building amongst people on all sides of the issue, or else move on altogether.

By: BeckySharper

BeckySharper — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 22:35:19 +0000

Eileen, you may not be aware of this, but “Irish” is not a race. My remarks were not “racist”, merely anti-Irish just as yours have been anti-American from the start.

Isn’t it fun when we can all learn together?

And now, I’m off to dinner…

By: Pilgrim Soul

Pilgrim Soul — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 22:33:41 +0000

Eileen: you remain confused. I didn’t call you a disgrace to feminism. You called me a disgrace to feminism, or, alternately, not even a feminist.

We are not a borg-like entity here and have no obligation to “correct” anything. And we do tend to think carefully about things, which none of your comments thus far have suggested you are doing. You have seized on every perceived insult to yourself without much cause while hurling them back at us. This is not feminism either, my friend.

By: Eileen Calder

Eileen Calder — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 22:28:32 +0000

What would I know – Sure I am just an irrational, drunken Irish woman who is a disgrace to feminism. Ordinary people on the streets of Belfast have more sense than some of your women. Rape is about power and control – alcohol and drugs do not cause rape. The fact that not a single one of you had the courage to correct Becky speaks volumes. Goodnight