Comments on: Wherein I am unsurprised

By: MissRumphius

MissRumphius — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 21:46:59 +0000

@DangerMouse, @funnyface: I was born when both my parents were doing their residency, and my mom left because she said that she rarely got to see me. She has gone back to work a couple of times, but in research labs, because she doesn’t want to start her residency all over again and the labs have been very flexible. I do think that if her residency had been part-time she wouldn’t have left, so funnyface, I do agree with you that medicine should respond to those needs.

By: alix

alix — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 20:30:23 +0000

I work in healthcare. My children are grown now, but 15-20 years ago I was allowed to bring them to work with me if they were ill (I had my own office, so it sort of worked), breastfeed on demand (my childcare provider was close, only 5 miles away) and my hours were flexible enough to come in late or leave early. Even now, I know a lot of nurses who work nights (when their partners are home with the kids) so they can be at home during the daytime and avoid daycare. Hard on the parents but saves a lot of money. The profession’s also flexible enough to allow for part-time or weekend work.

By: BeckySharper

BeckySharper — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 20:25:16 +0000

@Victorine & Maritsa: You ladies are lucky–we only get 12 weeks here at big media shop. And Victoirine, I love that your husband wants to be a SAHD. I wish I could find a dude like that (and that I made enough money to comfortably support a family, which could be tricky in NYC on my salary).

And good luck and Goddess bless with the baby-making!

By: Maritsa

Maritsa — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 19:19:11 +0000

@victorine – My firm gives 18 weeks too – we’re a smaller boutique firm that does biglaw work at biglaw rates but in a smaller market. They gave it so our NY office would be in step with other firms. I was the first one to take it. One of my friends just got told she shouldn’t take the whole maternity leave, that she should “show her face” during her leave, like the associate who took his four weeks paternity leave one week at a time.

In-house is where it’s at, but like you said, almost impossible to find now.

By: Topics about Education » Wherein I am unsurprised

Topics about Education » Wherein I am unsurprised — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 18:33:30 +0000

[...] sgeigeresq put an intriguing blog post on Wherein I am unsurprisedHere’s a quick excerptEvery mother is a working mother. Via Krypto @ Flickr.After yesterday’s post on the truly unhelpful “Dr.” Laura Schlessinger, I thought this study on the supposed “opt-out revolution” might make for an interesting read for us super-edumacated types; you know, the ones who are ever given… [...]

By: victorinemeurent

victorinemeurent — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 17:58:23 +0000

I’m a lawyer at a *big law* firm, and my husband and I are working on the kid thing (IVF looks like the next step). Big firms are lemmings when it comes to materinity leave, and the current standard is 4.5 months paid (during which you still accrue vacation) with up to six months off. I know that sounds incredibly generous, and it isn’t something that I take for granted, but it’s everything outside of that fact that makes it so hard to think about working here once we have a kid. When the economy is not in the tank, the hours here are pretty ridiculous, even once you make partner (consistently working 70 or 80 hour weeks, punctuated by really busy spans of time). And no matter how much lip service they may pay to “alternative” work schedules, as I’ve observed from my female colleagues with kids, it very rarely works. The standard model here for successful women is pretty much one of the following: (1) no kids, (2) stay at home spouse, or (3) full time nanny.

I have worked really hard to get where I am, and my practice doesn’t really allow for me to work at a small shop (I am a securities/M&A lawyer). I’m lucky in that my husband wants to be a SAHD, but if that was not the case, I’d be pretty screwed if I planned to stay at the big firm. My only other alternative would be trying to find an in-house job (working as a lawyer for a company), but those are notoriously hard to find in a good market, let alone now. But at least the hours at those jobs are more reasonable, even though it usually means a big pay cut.

By: PhDork

PhDork — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 17:55:18 +0000

If I were studying psychiatric problems, DangerMouse, I would swear we were the same person.

By: Pilgrim Soul

Pilgrim Soul — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 17:43:03 +0000

DangerMouse, you are ruining my escape-by-PhD-program plan over here.

By: DangerMouse

DangerMouse — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 17:42:21 +0000

Katie, you raise a good point–there is no way on God’s green earth that I would have put myself through what has turned out to be the Ph.D. from hell if I thought I was going to stop in ten years. I’d have done something that paid better and didn’t give me psychiatric problems (coincidentally while I was studying psychiatric problems).

By: Spark

Spark — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 16:38:00 +0000

Does the study mention for how long these women tend to leave the workforce?

I never wanted to be a stay at home mother, but if I have kids in the foreseeable future, my situation will be low-paying, low-satisfying job and no extended family nearby to help with childcare. I can’t imagine leaving the workforce entirely, because I want to remain employable. But I also can’t imagine working full-time and caring for a baby (/paying for childcare) in my circumstances.