As you have no doubt heard by now, this morning Vermont’s legislature broke new ground by overriding the Governor’s veto on same-sex marriage legislation. Not only did this move allow Vermont to enter the hallowed ranks of Massachusetts, Connecticut and Iowa as those states in the union that recognize same-sex marriage, it was the first of them to do so by affirmative act of the legislature as opposed to court compulsion.
In the comments, we Harpies would like to hear your loudest, proudest and foulest calls for your home states to take the same initiative. (I’d lead off the call, but as we know, I am a foreigner whose superior home country was among the first to recognize same-sex marriage waaaaaaaay back in 2003.)
*This title is inspired by the forlorn summer intern who once innocently entitled his conservative-workplace-wide email about a generous ice cream offer “Free BJs.” Poor soul.
Dear California:
You are a bitter, bitter disappointment. Here’s hoping New York will do this ex-pat proud.
Yours for at least another year,
Crabby
Dear Missouri (I’m choosing you, since Crabby already got my current state of residence),
I may be wasting my breath here, but what the fucking fuck? If my experience is any indication, you’re positively crawling with gays and lesbians. Why are you discriminating against your own daughters and sons?
You haven’t always been full of shit, and you even came close to redeeming yourself in the last presidential election. I know you know better than to allow religious whackaloons to run the show, so as we say in our state: SHOW ME.
Your give-’em-hell Harpy,
PhDork
Dear Virginia:
You really screwed the pooch on marriage rights in the past–see: Loving vs. Virginia, 1967. But’s never too late to set things right. Maybe this time the Supreme Court won’t have to straighten your ignorant shit out.
You went for Obama last year. How about some more change this year? VOTE GAY MARRIAGE!
Love,
Becky
Dear New York,
Saying that you will “recognize” gay marriages performed in other states in no way equals actually legalizing them. I promise to stop bitching about public transit fares if you emulate Vermont and Iowa. Or, at least, I won’t bitch quite as much.
Much love,
Sarah, who does not feel quite so proud to be a New Yorker today.
Dear Georgia,
Please let teh gayz– Ah, fuck it, who am I kidding?
Signed,
A world-weary Atlantan (who is afraid to leave the city limits, because the rest of the state is SCARY)
@ Kivrin: LOL
Dear Colorado,
I know this is going to be hard to ask. Especially since you’re the one who allowed the Right to Life shit to get so far in legislation.
Believe it or not, there are some gays here. In a little part of the city BEHIND YOUR BELOVED CAPITAL called Capital Hill. Also, believe it or not, some of them might like to get married. You know, the ceremony/union that isn’t denied to the other esteemed citizens of this state.
We have the Boulder yippie-liberals that mostly would agree with me, but some of my fellow Coloradans in Colorado Springs might not agree.
I am here to say: Please reconsider and look to Vermont for guidance.
I’ll also have you know that I moved here from Florida because the standard of living is far improved from my home state–Don’t let me down.
Not Holding My Breath,
JessMess
Dear Massachusetts–
I heart you and your great big liberal east coast elitist ways, for the most part. But nobody’s perfect. We just need your ridiculously democratic (but a bit too Catholic) legislature to codify what has been made clear by your example to the rest of the world over the past (almost!) five years–that giving teh gayz equal rights has no downside (as demonstrated by the fact that MA was recently determined to have the LOWEST divorce rate in the US) and SO MUCH UPSIDE (fun weddings and the income it generates for the state, happy families, equality, etc.)!!!!
Hugs,
Victorine
(I know, kind of weak given every one else’s more legitimate beefs, but we’ve just been one-upped by our northern neighbor, so I think I have *something* to complain about here…)
Dear Pennsylvania,
You’ve already voted for Santorum. Now let santorum flow freely within the bounds of legal marriage. Or more legal marriages.
Spark
p.s. I wish I could quit you.
Dear Georgia/South Carolina,
I don’t give a FUCK what the Southern Baptist Christian head-up-their-asses majority tells you. Let gay people marry NOW. The world will not end, eight-year-olds will not start getting knocked up, and it will not rain fire from the sky. The economy will improve, that’s for sure.
NOW DO IT, SKANKS.
Love,
Vegkitty
@Spark. LOL! Let there be legally sanctioned santorum for everyone, gay and straight!
@Spark: Remember when John Ashcroft sang “Let the eagle soar”? I can hear it now, the new Pennsylvania state song: “Let san-tooooor-um floooooow…”
@Kivrin: And now this song is stuck in my head.
I’d write a letter to the State of South Carolina, but I’m afraid she can’t even read.
JessMess, thanks for putting it to Colorado. There are reasons to hope – some activists are already gathering signatures for a ballot measure in 2010 to legalize SSM.
Along the lines of Victorine’s comment – I think we need some kind of massive, nationwide PR campaign, featuring hundreds of diverse, straight married couples from MA, CT, VT, IA (and CA!) talking about how their marriages are IN NO WAY threatened by all the gay people who’ve gotten married in their states. How their “traditional families” are in fact just fine with the two daddies or two mommies across the street. We need to counteract the hate-filled language the crazies spew, and it needs to come from those most “affected” by SSM’s influence (and I mean, they aren’t really affected at all, other than being happy).
To my mind, there hasn’t been enough “the sky hasn’t fallen in Massachusetts”-type attention.
As Massachusetts is already taken, I’ll go with my original, original home state.
Dear Michigan,
I know you are having a REALLY hard time right now, however, I think it’s important to take on something as monumental as gay rights at exactly a time like this. Your state laws explicitly defining marriage as something between one man and one woman are outdated. You offer no recognition of civil unions or partnerships, let alone marriages. Please, show the rest of your Midwestern brothers and sisters that Iowa isn’t the only Midwest state cool enough to do this.
stacyinDEEEEE-troit.
Dearest PA,
What Spark said.
Hopelessly devoted,
SarahMC
@ShinyObjects: That PR campaign with straight couples was on TV in California right before the Prop 8 vote and it failed to pull the collective heads out of the collective asses. I like the idea about “hey, we’ve been doing it in MA for years now and NOTHING’S HAPPENED!” Of course, for most people “we’ve been doing it in MA” is still not going to be persuasive.
Dear Texas,
…
Don’t let the immigrant yankees of the last thirty years (Bush&Co) ruin the state. Real Texans should not be afraid of homosexuality.
Dear Pennsylvania,
Seriously. I mean, come on already. Really.
Love,
loxosceles
Dear New Jersey,
Wouldn’t you like a little attention other than lame jokes about the Turnpike and the aroma? You know what to do.
xoxo
kithkin
This isn’t a letter to a state, but to the NYTimes, and I’m completely baffled by it:
I feel like she’s using code, but damned if I know what she’s trying to get at. Can anyone call me on the clue-phone?
@PhDork: I cannot decipher this code. Yeah…I’m baffled, too.
@PhDork: The whaaaaaaa?
Is she trying to say that marriage is in the exclusive domain of women, so any changes to marriage require our consent/consultation/approval? That’s both a Logic FAIL and a Feminism FAIL.
And what does she mean “there has been no thoughtful discussion about this?” Has she been hiding under a rock for the past 10 years?
All I can gather is gay marriage makes her feel icky but she wants to avoid traditional religious sounding “sanctity of marriage” arguments when articulating this.
I remember from a recent class in which we discussed Lawrence v. Texas that there are voices in the debate that are gay-friendly but anti-marriage; but from the very brief overview my professor went through, it seemed mostly like these people were opposed to all marriage because of the power structures and gendered language and would have preferred to do away with it altogether. Perhaps this Claire is part of a fringe group Professor skipped because it’s not a major player? Or maybe she’s a one-woman fringe group all her own.
@ PHDork: She’s kidding, right? Is this some bizarre attempt at sarcasm or satire or… ?
What the hell should a straight woman’s opinion matter? She sounds like a white dude for chrissakes.
Yeah, I’ve been looking at it again, and I still don’t get it. I think it might be that she sees marriage as a source of power for women, or, alternately, and more likely, she sees marriage (no matter who’s entering into it) as a trap, and wants to destroy it utterly, rather than support it, even if it means equal treatment for gays and lesbians.
I’m no big fan of marriage (as a religious institution or as a social necessity), but I don’t think the answer is “deny same-sex marriage.” I believe that opening marriage to any consenting adults is going to do plenty to destroy rigid sex-roles, essentialism, and all the other BS I rail against.
@SarahMC: White dudes everywhere are offended by that statement!
Dear North Carolina,
Hey, baby, you know I love you. I keep trying to leave, but then I say “fuck” or “shit” and the words are far too drawn out and twangy for me to forget where I come from. (Plus, people laugh.) And I’m proud of you for going blue for the first time in FOR-FUCKING-EVER. That was pretty fucking cool.
But now is the time… okay, fuck that reasonable bullshit about equality and humanity. NC, don’t get beat by South Carolina. Remember, they are the bastard state to our greatness.
Off to eat some bbq with vinegar-based sauce,
Clouds
@PhDork: I keep re-reading that last paragraph. I don’t think she’s against marriage. I think she’s clinging to those gender roles (wife, mother) as, maybe, one of the few things women can actively choose to be. Maybe? Strange, but I can kind of understand why she thinks that would be a feminist idea.
Okay, I’m gonna do Tennessee, because I have the feeling there’s probably someone else out there who can do Illinois.
Dear Tennessee,
You pretend to be all Dixiecrat conservative and stuff, but we all know that’s not really you. I mean, you only went along with the Confederacy because Mississippi and Arkansas were being total teases, and a third of the state didn’t really go along with it anyway, and as soon as the war ended you ran back to the Union. You were the state that ratified the Nineteenth Amendment. And then back during the Civil Rights movement your Senators, Mr. Kefauver and Mr. Gore, were the only holdouts from the Southern Manifesto (well, except for LBJ).
You need to embrace your pleasure-loving side. Think about Elvis. Think about Dolly Parton. Think about the state quarter that doesn’t feature a boring ol’ preacher talking about sin and repentance; it features a fiddle and a guitar! Add in Lynchburg’s Jack Daniels, some East Tennessee moonshine, and the hippies at Bonnaroo and you’ve got a hootenanny that can stand up to anything those Yankees can throwdown. And everyone knows that there’s no better occasion for a party than a gay marriage.
Finally, on a more serious note, you still owe America for voting for George W. Bush, and not your native son Al Gore, in 2000. I mean, you REALLY owe the rest of America.
I’ll try to make it down this summer, but you know how things get.
Kisses,
RocktheDebit
P.S.: Sorry about the Lady Vols not making it to the Final Four. Better luck next year!
Screw it. I’m gonna do one for Illinois as well.
Dear Illinois,
You know how Chicago really, really, REALLY wants the Olympics in 2016? ‘Course you do. You know what would really impress the International Olympic Committee? Marriage equality. I mean, the IOC probably doesn’t want to give the Olympics to Spain for the second time in twenty-four years, but as of right now Madrid’s the only candidate city where two people of any gender can marry. You KNOW the IOC is going to factor civil rights into their decision.
Besides, we can’t let Iowa think it’s cooler than you, can we? Of course not.
Yours in citizenship and taxes,
RocktheDebit
P.S. It would also distract everyone from G-Rod.
Oh, I need to add a p.s. to my letter to NC…
P.S. Hey, NC, remember when the media flipped out about the fact that young liberals of many races lived in the South and that they, gasp, might actually vote? Yea, well, that made a lot of conservatives nervous, obvs, so the media had to provide the fair and balanced view, which meant they set up cameras outside an early voting station in Fayetteville, a city of soldiers and strip clubs and dying dreams, to capture angry rednecks yelling crazy racist shit at the line of black folks trying to be all patriotic and whatnot.
Baby, let’s prove every person wrong who saw that video clip and pointed at the television and said, “SEE! I told you they were all racists!” Let’s do something to prove we’re not all bigots, mmkay?
And since I know you watched the game last night, GO TARHEELS! xoxo – Clouds
Dear Oregon,
When I moved to you from Atlanta three years ago, I thought I had found the liberal mecca I’d been searching for all my life. But then you voted against gay marriage and just blew my mind. WTF? Shh…I know you didn’t mean it baby…let’s set that shit right.
Love,
Carrie