This weekend, my friend and I are jogging in the park, sharing on-line dating stories. She’s just been on a date with a guy who sounds great on paper. And then they had an Awkward Conversation.
You see, she’s 40 and he’s 43. And apparently he wants children, and it’s important enough to him that he mentions it on the second date. My friend was a little taken aback that he brought it up so soon, but I wasn’t. After all, I called off a marriage-bound relationship when my boyfriend changed his mind about wanting to have kids. If having children is important, I’m all in favor of getting it on the table early. You could potentially save yourself enormous heartache.
But then Mr. On-line Romeo put his foot in it:
Jogging Buddy: “So I said to him, “You know, I’m 40.”
Me: “Right. “And he’s not getting any younger himself.”
Jogging Buddy: “Exactly. I said, “Well, I’d consider adoption.”
Me: “What’d he say to that?”
Jogging Buddy: “He just said, ‘Oh, I’d rather have kids of my own. Even if you’re older, the doctors can really make miracles these days.'”
Me: “What the fuck? How fucking cavalier is that? Does he know what fertility treatments are like for women? All the drugs and needles and hormones and shit? Make miracles, my ass! That’s fucking easy for him to say. He just has to wank into a cup!”
Jogging Buddy: “Becky, you’re ranting.”
Now, this beloved friend of mine has already been through two rounds of fertility treatments in her late thirties. They were unsuccessful. So to have this guy breezily suggest that oh, any future wife of his should just get some fertility treatments, is pretty fucking insensitive. Or ignorant. Or both. Oddly, my jogging buddy wasn’t all that fazed by his response, but I was steamed on her behalf.
So ladies, did I overreact? Or is the guy an ignorant assweasel?