Comments on: On Younger Men: An Overshare

By: k!m

k!m — Wed, 27 May 2009 21:34:03 +0000

@bellacoker: 100% agreed! i was only drawing a distinction between non-sexual communication and other forms for the sake of the blog content.

:~)

By: bellacoker

bellacoker — Wed, 27 May 2009 14:10:47 +0000

@k!m: I think humans are communication machines, everything we do is a form of communication. Sex, if done correctly, is just another form, in my opinion.

By: too_much_info?

too_much_info? — Tue, 26 May 2009 21:18:43 +0000

@ceejeemcbeegee, not all men over 40 need viagra! I know from personal experience.

Maybe only men over 40 who don’t work out and eat right need drugs? Certain bad habits harden the arteries and contribute to erectile dysfunction. Erections depend on healthy circulation.

By: BeckySharper

BeckySharper — Tue, 26 May 2009 17:20:30 +0000

@k!m: Thanks! The whole behing honest about evaluating what we want gets MUCH easier the older we get, or at least, that’s been the case for me. It’s a real relief that these days I’m able to say yes or no to something and be totally guilt-free about it.

@Plum-Pie: The weather has been AMAZING. Or, should I say, BRILLIANT!

By: k!m

k!m — Tue, 26 May 2009 15:07:47 +0000

i’m 21, but i feel the same way becky. both of my long-term relationships have been with older people, though i’ve dated the same age/younger in between.

wanting to be with someone who can “do it” both right AND all night long is a perfect metaphor for so many aspects of a relationship – not only is sex better for me with a same-age/older partner, but conversations, connections, discussions, decision-making, etc. are better too.

communication, like sex, is done better with someone who understands how important it is to a healthy relationship. (though sex isn’t as important as communication – a shoutout to my asexual sisters and brothers!) that is simply too hard to find in younger people, for a multitude of reasons.

although to be honest, i appreciate your capacity for personal insight even more than the actual blog entry. it’s a tough thing for us women to confidently evaluate what WE want and HOW (usually teh menz are around to tell us, right?), and i applaud your assertiveness.

By: bellacoker

bellacoker — Tue, 26 May 2009 14:28:41 +0000

I know exactly what you mean! It wouldn’t be so bad if someone had taught them how NOT TO TALK.

Many of the younger men I have met lately have bought into the Player and/or Pick-up Artist b.s., and I want to shake them and tell them they are much more likely to be successful if they would Shut Up, and let me think that they are mysterious and interesting.

By: la sooz

la sooz — Tue, 26 May 2009 02:44:10 +0000

Oh man I should be ashamed of myself but somehow, am not…I’m 41 and my “not-boyfriend” as you say, Becky, is 31. It’s heavenly. Like, 3 times in an hour heavenly. But I’m not looking for husband material yet. He happens to be a great person too, but we’re not on the same path. It might be a dangerous trend for me though because I almost crash my car when I see the local college men’s track team out for runs…!

@emilyanne: elderly 40something alcoholics: Snort! That used to be my type too! No more!

By: Plum-Pie

Plum-Pie — Mon, 25 May 2009 20:11:26 +0000

I’m 28 and I feel 26 is too young a man, for me.

OT: How nice that you’re here while there’s fairly decent weather… It’s only rained once today (so far).

By: ceejeemcbeegee

ceejeemcbeegee — Mon, 25 May 2009 17:19:58 +0000

Yeah, younger men don’t know what they’re doing. But older (40+) guys need viagra these days. So we randy 32-40yo are SOL.

By: emilyanne

emilyanne — Mon, 25 May 2009 16:32:09 +0000

all my boyfriends were several years older than me – around 10-15 years on average. My husband however is four years younger so I suppose it’s a case of never ruling out all possiblities. I always said I’d never marry someone younger but really the gap wasn’t much in the end 33 to 29 and he was more mature than the elderly 40something alcoholics I’d been dating previously.