Feast your eyes and ears on this amazing spoof of the Dodge Charger SuperBowl commercial we hated. I am having trouble embedding it here but I could not wait to share!
Transcript:
I will get up and pack your lunch at 6:30 a.m. I will eat half a grapefruit for breakfast. I will get the kids ready for school. I will ignore your smelly loser friend who is crashing on our couch. I will make 75 cents for every dollar you make doing the same job. I will assert myself and get called a bitch. I will catch you staring at my breasts but pretend not to notice. I will put my career on hold to raise your children. I will diet, Botox, and wax. Everything. I will assure you that size doesn’t matter. I will be a lady in the street but a freak in the bed. I will turn a blind eye to your ever-encroaching baldness. I will humor your Fantasy Baseball obsession. I will pretend not to notice when you cry at the end of Rudy. I will watch TV shows where fat, stupid, unattractive men have beautiful wives. I will allow you to cheat on me with other women. I will see Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Twice. I will elect male politicians who will make a decision about my body. I will listen to Rush and tell you, yes, if there were a gold medal for air-drumming, you would win it. I will get angry, and you will ask if it’s that time of the month. I will watch Superbowl commercials that depict men as emasculated and depressed, and I will feel so fucking sorry for you.
(h/t The Sexist)
I watched that, and gave a loud and clear, “Sing it, sister!” and then decided I had better go watch the original Dodge commercial so I could see what was being refuted.
What the hell? I know there’s a lot of WTF involved in that commercial but since when is eating fruit with breakfast a form of oppression? I guess Dodge meant to make men sound oppressed by the Evil Vaginocracy, but really, they just made them sound like a bunch of whiny douches.
I know, right? I think that makes the spoof even more powerful because it’s like – you “have to” eat healthy foods and allegedly I make you carry my chapstick? I deal with institutional oppression and I play mommy not only to the kids I singlehandedly raise but to my immature husband.
My solution is not to marry immature louts but that’s not the point.
Amen to that. I’m so fortunate that the Geek Husband What Rules is not one of the asshats. Every so often, his societal conditioning will kick in and he’ll start to pull some of that crap, then I raise an eyebrow and he sighs and says, “I was doing it again, wasn’t I? Being one of those douches I hate.”
I know, I know, it’s so wrong of me to oppress him like that. /sarcasm
I watched this next to my boyfriend and at the end of it he was like, “But wait, the women don’t get anything. The men got a car, but the women’s version just ended without them getting anything to compensate for it all.” And I look at him and go, “Exactly.”
BOOM! Pwned.
Badass. I am so fucking tired of hearing whiny douchebags talk about how they are being emasculated by TEH EVIL WIMMENZ. OH GOD EVERYONE’S PUTTIN’ THE STRAIGHT WHITE MEN DOWN!!!1
I am showing this to my boyfriend the second he gets home. I’m pretty sure he’s gonna love it as much as I do.
We get the joy of being a woman! Doesn’t that make up for…well…everything?
@MM
HA! No no it doesn’t because we are indeed harpies who must have it all!! (Equality is everything, dontcha know?)
oh frick. thanks for supplying an interesting and meaningful thesis break, in addition to my lady gaga videos. i love how i can always count on you ladies. and i don’t mean bitches.
AWESOME response to that shitty ad! At the end I also thought Gee, men get a car, and women get nothing. How typical.
Here is a man’s response to the original Charger ad, making fun of it’s heteronormativity.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GX6_jCvAqCA
Is it pitiful that I kind of tear up at the end?
Oh! I started to read the youtube comments! Going to watch the video again to get the taste out of my mouth.
Love this! I posted it on my facebook. I can’t wait to see the wank that ensues.
@ Ms. M
I know! The video made me smile but in a grim way. The wording is perfect, they aren’t kidding. That really is many womens lots in life. I would like to know where their car is or whatever big prize they get. At least they have all their hair?
I love the video; I think I’m going to have to watch it at least once a day to give it more hits, but it’s sad.
And Queen_George, it is so not pitiful that you got upset watching it. It’s horrible what we womin live through; the fact that all of us are still alive is proof that we are warriors, who could kick patriarchy ass if we all put our minds to it.
Has anyone started a campaign to tell Dodge that they can live without our business? Clearly we haven’t suffered enough to deserve their products.
One of the things that I love about the existence of the internet is that stuff like the original ad gets called out for being problematic in a really public way. I’m sure it was happening before the web as well but it’s much more immediate and widespread now and I think that’s great.
And the response video is just perfect.
The set-up and pay-off of this spoof is delicious.
While, yes, clearly, men are not oppressed, what is particularly interesting about this ad is that Dodge was able to tap into these emotions: men “feel” oppressed. Laughable, yes. Scary, even more so.
*sets writing style to academic-type-wannabe*
This might appear, on the surface, to be “men versus women”. Another aspect of this, however, is the perpetuation of confining patriarchal gender binaries and their attendant expectations and performances. Which, admittedly, are perpetuated not just by men, but by some women as well (present company excepted), both in how people choose to live their adult lives and in how they raise their children. Both men and women lose under this system; that’s why Dodge can tap into this “feeling”.
I’m not letting men off the hook here for “feeling” oppressed when they really aren’t; I’m suggesting that this commercial and its spoof point to the need for a re-definition (or complete rejection) of patriarchal gender binaries.
*turns off academic-type-wannabe setting*
@ Imaginary, yes, let’s!
Yeah, I posted to the video on my Facebook response, and a comment shit storm ensued. Needless to say, it gave me the opportunity to finally DEFRIEND some of my more annoying “friends” who just think we humorless bonerkillers just need to learn to take a joke. And, it’s “only an ad.” It’s almost not even worth arguing with them, they’re sofa king stupid. Almost.
@Influences:
Amen! When I see things like this I wonder if men really think it is women who have an iron grip on their gender expression.
I mean, you know what I think is mad-fun, sitting around with my guy friends and calling them out as “fags” and “pussies” when they take half a step out of their proscribed gender roles. It makes for such a lovely calming evening, and you really get to know your friends in an environment of trust and acceptance. /ultra-snark
[...] Full script for MacKenzie’s parody Share and [...]
SarahMC said, “My solution is not to marry immature louts but that’s not the point.” I think it sort of is the whole point. There is so much pressure from all sides to get married, and there are way too many immature louts out there, for it to end up any other way. For a lot of women, it is either “settle for the one who will marry you” or “suffer the consequences of being an old maid,” and the latter is too much for them to handle. I am a very successful professional woman, but an unsettling number of people in my life were way happier about my recent engagement than they were about my recent law school scholarship. This is not a new sentiment, but I just wish more women could see the importance of being able to get along without a partner. It goes beyond cliche to say that you have to love yourself first, but it is still true. Sigh. I wish I had a good solution (other than not marrying the immature louts at all, thereby giving them a reason to shape up).
So according to the Dodge ad, their ideal male customer does not throw his underwear in the hamper or care to recycle? Guess they are selling to 50-plus losers still living in 1963 and residing in someone´s basement. Super Bowl ads do make me feel sorry for men…what a bunch of Walter Mitties.
Holy shit…awaken the bitches! I guessed that superbowl comemrcial WAS really effective. Phsyco, lesbian, man-bashing feminists are on the loose!
Billybob, I have approved your comment in order to ask: is this comment satire?
Because it isn’t very good.
no it isn’t satire. the whole thing over this superbowl commercial, that aparantly offended a buch of “man-sports watching”, man-bashing, angry and bitter feminists…is just ludricous. If this is all it takes to form some freaky “girl power” revenge group, over a lights hearted commercial aimed at football watching men….then you’s really are a sad pathetic bunch. i amigine that “spoof’ won’t sent to many men their way…too bad…back to the LARGE dildo’s I guess..
Hi BillyBob! Are your spelling mistakes part of the satire? They make your comments extra hilarious! You have a real way with words!
But billybob, I thought football was a sport for women! After all, there are all of those big, muscular men in really tight pants. Why would you watch football if not to check out the tight end’s ass? Oh, my poor lady-brain! I’m so confused!
Billybob,
Then why are you wasting time here? Go do what the told you and prove what a man’s man you are! Go buy a Dodge!
And imagine what my fathers surprise will be when I let him know that he was wrong. REAL men don’t love and respect their families and friends. REAL men don’t fight for equality and respect opinions. REAL men aren’t afraid to say, “hey that’s not funny that’s actually kind of mean.”
Apparently REAL men just need to buy Dodge!
Great satire, but I have to quibble about including “listening to Rush” among those things we women do only to humor the menz. Rush frickin’ rawk.
So. I went home to New Orleans to watch the Superbowl because my Saints finally came marching in. (Some of us women are actual football fans!) And I saw those awful commercials, and I winced repeatedly into my beer. And then the 2nd half started, and the Saints owned it, and all my pain just vanished and the bar went nuts and the street erupted in joy and, well, you can see how it all went down on any number of YouTube videos.
Later that week, I returned to my husband in Boulder, and, as it happened, we had a small spousal conference about how shaving detritus covering the bathroom sink is a poor welcome home, all things considered. (I’m sure if he’d been the one to leave town, I’d have spaced something myself, and he’d need to complain. We take turns being the space cadet.)
“Sorry, I’ll clean it up,” says he.
“Thanks,” says I, “Understand, though, you’re not getting a flashy new Dodge for doing it.”
He rolled his eyes. “Oh God that commercial. That awful, sexist commercial.”
I love my husband so very much.