With an MBA, bags of fertilizer in my garden, a former employee of a financial institution and a naturalized Pakistani-American, I bear an eerie resemblance to Faisal Shahzad, infamous NYC bomb plotter.
So naturally the FBI turned up at our door.
We did not know not to let them in. We were too terrified to be aware of our civil liberties, which include the right to having an attorney present at the time of questioning. As immigrants, fear is a familiar cloak. The flash of red and blue in the rear view mirror sets our hearts thudding. Maybe they’ll deport us for speeding, we wonder as we reach shakily for license and registration. We would never turn away a lawman because of our terror of any misstep. Certainly the draconian laws recently passed in Arizona only added to our ever-present anxiety. We consoled ourselves that as citizens, albeit naturalized ones, we had the right to due process. And then came Faisal Shahzad.
The federal agents asked why my parents were out of the country visiting Pakistan. Their tones were polite but cold, their aspects forbidding. My sister let them in. We have nothing to hide, she thought innocently.
Does your father go to the mosque? They asked.
Did terrorists contact you while you were in Pakistan last? They badgered.
My sister, eight months pregnant, tried to explain with some degree of equanimity that my father is an executive for a global IT consultancy, a government contractor. Asia is his area of responsibility—and expertise. This involves travel to Asia, including Pakistan where he has ancestral property, ties to family and friends, and where he has been involved in a sales contract with the Pakistani government.
But my sister stumbled over the mosque issue. As a Muslim man, attending Friday prayers is a religious requirement. It is a place where men are to convene, hear enjoinders of peace, goodwill toward all mankind and be reminded of their duties as fathers, brothers, sons, husbands and citizens. Yes, our father occasionally attends prayers at a mosque, but how do you admit this fact in the face of reports of nefarious recruiting activity at some mosques? Since when has admitting attendance of a place of worship been cause for recrimination and fear?
I tried to imagine my German-American friends undergoing similar lines of scrutiny. Did you have contact with the Nazis when you were eating bratwurst at Dusseldorf Airport? Have you or any of your family members been involved with concentration camps? When did you last attend Sunday mass?
I awake to nightmares of being shipped off to the sort of internment camps Japanese Americans were sent to in the aftermath of Pearl Harbor. As Pakistani-Americans, we are now seen as threats to American National Security. Like the Japanese, we are racially easily identifiable. Most of us have telltale brown skins and features. We shop at halal stores or attend mosques. It would be so easy to corral and sequester us.
I wonder, did every Catholic family get interrogated after Timothy McVeigh (a baptized Catholic) orchestrated the Oklahoma City bombing?
We are taxpayers. We contribute to New Orleans rebuilding charities. We attend baseball games and buy hotdogs. But we are still seen as threats. Neighbors and colleagues who have known us for decades suddenly wonder whether we are sleepers.
All this suspicion because some guy-gone-mad Pakistani-American decided to take it upon himself to take revenge on America.
What for? That is not yet clear to any of us. What we know is, he has made life in this country a living hell for those of us who so closely follow its peaceful and generally inclusive tenets.
My father has lived here as a law-abiding citizen for 20 years, going through the prototypical immigrant cycle of struggle, toil and eventual success. He has two grandchildren born on this soil, raised on American beef and grain, and two grandchildren on the way, both of whom will also be able to run for President and Commander in Chief one day. The only time he’s terrifying is when he has his golf clubs in his hands and we’re playing for stakes.
Are we going to face questioning every time we leave the US to visit our families overseas? How many times will we be profiled? Our names alone warrant rejection from job interviews and for those of us who embrace headscarves, we are perpetually viewed as harboring evil public intent, the sorry subjects of a misogynistic religion.
Some algorithm of a computer driven by a combination of our ancestry and travel patterns has marked my family as suspect to authorities. As a result, we are now dealing with the anxiety of those who are viewed in this country as potential threats, despite having obeyed every law of the nation. Our profound beliefs in peace and lifelong actions as God-fearing, good people are now in question.
I am scared. We as a family are petrified. This is what our Pakistani-American dream has become.
If you are approached by the FBI, please be aware of your rights and civil liberties. The following links are instructional and are recommended for all Muslim-Americans who may be targeted for random questioning or profiling:
http://www.cair.com/CivilRights/KnowYourRights.aspx
http://www.cair.com/Portals/0/pdf/civilrights2008.pdf
http://www.aclu.org/human-rights-religion-belief/charitable-giving-and-war-terrorism-financing
http://www.aclu.org/
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Pursuit of Harpyness. Pursuit of Harpyness said: Guest Post: Halima Voyles on the Pakistani-American Dream @ http://bit.ly/9VTDW8 [...]
Halima, I’m so sorry for what you and your family have been through. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
I wish I had some great ideas for ways to fight the profiling of Muslims (or anyone else), but in this current climate, I’m not sure what to do. (This story in particular has me feeling really depressed. http://gawker.com/5538053/outrage-muslims-want-to-build-mosque)
As a Canadian of South Asian Muslim origin, I’m somewhat more sheltered from this form of targeted harassment than those who live south of the border (and as a woman, not as suspect). Still, I was terrified to hear about the NY bombing, not only because of the horrible nature of the senseless violence, but also because of the inevitable suspicion and doubt that would be cast upon
Muslims, Indians, Pakistanis, brown-skinned folk in North America and across the world, yet again. My brother happened to be returning home from a wedding in Pakistan around the time it happened and, with him being somewhat naive and clueless about the world, I was afraid of what might happen at the airport when they screened a brown dude with facial hair and a Pakistani passport stamp. Thankfully, he made it home just fine. My anger at the remorseless people who commit these acts is about on par with my anger towards authority figures who use it as an excuse for racial profiling without any legal basis.
It’s also something that needs to be tackled more openly in the progressive Muslim community in conjunction with our non-Muslim allies. Muslims collectively should not have to “apologize” for the actions of individuals, but I do think we need to work on not being so insular within our community.
Also, thank you for the piece, Halima – my thoughts are with you and your family. I hope your fears are never realized.
Speaking as a ‘natural-born USA citizen’ [sic] I will say that the USA has always been a racist xenophobic nation – while blathering big lies to the World that encourage everyone to make tremendous sacrifices in order to migrate here. “Catch-22″ of the worst kind.
This is horrifying. I’m so sorry and angry that you are being subjected to this.
I just got around to reading this. Thank you for writing it. I’m not sure what else to say other than I’m sorry.
Thank you for sharing your experience. This is why it’s so important to stand up to those who argue that we should do away with Constitutional protections in “certain” circumstances. It’s not that they’re failsafe, always applied fairly, or without flaws; but at least they’re something.
Thanks for sharing your story. I hope it gets re-posted a lot. I think if more people can see the damage and upset this kind of interrogation can cause, it will open their hearts and minds.
I’m so sorry that you and your family (and all Americans of Middle-Eastern descent…oh heck, all non-white people, for that matter) have to go through that. But thank you for sharing with us. This is a great piece.
Halima – I’m so sorry to hear you and your family are going through this. Thanks for sharing your story, as I’m sure many people are not aware this is going on.
I wish I could say that I’m surprised, though. I was dating and living with a young Pakistani man in San Francisco in September 2001. Even in a city as liberal and progressive as San Fran, and even though he was the opposite of the stereotypical Muslim terrorist (atheist, clean-cut, fashionably dressed, etc) he faced a lot of harassment – death threats by phone, fearful or angry glares from passersby in the streets, harassment by cops, etc. I can only imagine what it’s like now after the Times Square incident.
Hang in there, and I hope this calms down and you’re able to live in peace again soon.
What an important post. Thank you for linking to your constitutional rights. I live in Canada but many people are not aware of their own rights and that you can refuse authority figures entry into your own home, at least.
My thoughts are with you and your family.
I’m also sorry about what you are going through, and want to say thanks for putting up the links at the end, as they will certainly come in handy for someone reading this. I’d also like to say, on a side note, that your post was beautifully written.
The point about Timothy McVeigh spoke to me as someone baptized Catholic.
It is an outrage that the government is trampling over your constitutional rights as U.S. residents.
I just saw all these comments today – having not visited the post since last May. I am touched by all the outreach above, and thank you for your kind comments.
The story had a good end! My father worked with an Immigration Rights lawyer in Maryland and talked with the FBI, and apparently all is now “fine.” His employer jumped into the fray and provided a letter and documentation of how the trips were employer-sponsored. The FBI quickly stopped its interrogations.
America is a wonderful nation, but we have a long way to go in terms of how we handle “differences.” Aggression breeds aggression. There has to be a better way of weeding out the bad guys! Thank you again! You guys made my day!