Comments on: Troll Poetry Part 3: The Douchening

By: Suzanne

Suzanne — Fri, 04 Jun 2010 01:22:04 +0000

I can’t stop laughing at how shocked he is “$#!% like this makes it on the web.” You know, because the web has such an arduous screening process. It’s not an Ivy League school douche-canoe, it’s THE INTERNET.

For the record, I am not saying your post isn’t Ive League worth, SarahMC. It totally is.

By: Mackey

Mackey — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 23:25:21 +0000

@bella, I thought of Ms Solanas as well

By: Amanda Marcotte

Amanda Marcotte — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 22:39:02 +0000

Just because a dude knocks you up by pulling a condom off against your will doesn’t make you a victim. That’s like calling Kleenex a victim because a dude spooged in it. You have to be a human being to be a victim.

By: Kathmandu

Kathmandu — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 22:35:34 +0000

I remember reading, in the context of distinguishing between murder in the first degree (deliberate, intended), and things like manslaughter (not deliberate or intended), that the law will not accept claims that you ‘didn’t intend’ an obviously likely consequence of your action. That is, if you admit that you stabbed someone right through the chest, on purpose, while they were sleeping, you can’t claim that you only intended an injury short of death; death is an obviously likely consequence of a stab to the chest.

Likewise, pregnancy is an obviously likely consequence of unprotected sex. It may not have been the guy’s primary goal, but it was an effect he was willing to cause in pursuit of his goal, and that makes it part of his Intent.

By: bellacoker

bellacoker — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 19:02:06 +0000

Oh, yes, the Martian colony of New Australia.

By: sybann

sybann — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 18:27:16 +0000

Put him on the rocket ship with the rest of the douchenozzles and we’ll colonize Mars. No women, just rapists and poor persecuted sexist asshats.

By: NefariousNewt

NefariousNewt — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 18:10:12 +0000

Any man who takes off a condom for any reason, other than at the end of sexual intercourse, is a Class A-1 Fuckwit. Sorry. Had to be said. Men are the reason women get pregnant, and rarely anymore, it seems, are they taking adequate precautions to keep it from happening. They’re not even discussing it with a partner. As I wrote on Jezebel, “Don’t go around cramming your cock into women and crossing your fingers that nothing happens.”

By: Melissa

Melissa — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 17:59:04 +0000

Even if his argument that men only take off condoms because it feels better, and not to control their partners…does he realize how STUPID he’s painting all men to be? “I think I’m just going to take off this condom because it’ll feel better for the next 5 minutes and…hmmm…wait, wasn’t there something the condom’s supposed to DO? Isn’t it supposed to serve some sort of purpose? Aw, screw it.”

I refuse to believe that men are that stupid. Some men, maybe. But to claim that that’s the primary reason for most men who take off condoms in the middle of sex? Give your gender some credit, dude!

(Although, I dunno, FWIW I can think of at least 4 partners I’ve had just within the last year who took off the condom halfway through sex. It does seem to be EXTREMELY common…)

By: baraqiel

baraqiel — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 17:56:42 +0000

But, but, Mr. Troll! I thought the best nut was on a woman’s face, amirite?

By: Meg

Meg — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 17:47:49 +0000

I know it’s wrong, but a part of me REALLY hopes this dude gets herpes trying his “get a better nut” method.

Also, @Becky: Ba-dum ching!