Apparently I fart in my sleep. This is not a big deal for the LTR’s, but sleeping over on a first date and being woken up by the sound of your own flatulence is not so much fun. I usually pretend I’m still asleep. Ugh. Hasn’t deterred anybody yet, but it definitely makes me anxious.

And yes with the picking! I used to love pulling the stray hairs out of my boyfriend’s eyebrows until it drove him crazy. We both do martial arts, so things got a little heated, but I stopped when it was no longer consensual. Back zits are fun, too.

As recent development in my life has made it necessary to have more thorough communication prior to sex with a new partner. I originally dreaded it, but have since found that the quality of interaction is so much better once you put everything on the table. Gosh, communication, who’d have thought? After that, farting doesn’t seem so significant.

My favorite memory was with one partner who, after I seductively said, “how did you get so sexy?” accidentally let a huge one rip. Good times.

Hmm, it’s been a while since I started in a new relationship but I guess my mask slips pretty quickly. After all, there are times when you can’t hold in a fart say. I think I’d usually give an embarrassed snigger and avert my eyes and if he responds with ‘don’t worry, it’s ok!’ then that’s great. If not, then that would be a bit of deal breaker but somehow I’ve managed to pick SOs with a similar sense of toilet humour before it gets to that stage.

As for who is the ‘gross-out gate-keeper’ that would be me but that’s most likely a hang-over from being the sensible big sister rather than something that is actually essential to me.

In my current relationship, the SO let slip that I sometimes farted in my sleep. But it was after he farted in front of me. And it wasn’t a deal breaker or anything. Afterall, we were having sex, sometimes sharing toothbrushes, and kissing each other.

I don’t mind people using the bathroom or speaking to me when I’m on the toilet (defecating or urinating). But I do find it funny that the SO does not like to be spoken to when he’s doing number twos. But I respect that.

Despite our different ideas of the ettiquette of bathroom and other such things usuage, I don’t think there was a lot of mystery to begin with, we met each other through playing football. And were sweaty and stinky and red faced, and there’s really no where to go after you’ve met after some intense “non-sexy” ball time.

Anyway, the first time we were hanging out at my house we were having a few drinks on the back porch. He went to use the bathroom and came back immediately, stumbling over his words, saying I might want to come inside. I was on my period, and at this time I bled A LOT. Like, change super tampons twice an hour. I also let the trash build up a bit, and my dog had gotten in the bathroom. Chewed, bloody cotton was strewn all across the bathroom and the room outside. He was so amazingly cool about it, I can’t believe it. He never said anything about it.

We use the toilet in private, but that’s about it. However, in regards to the “mask slipping,” I’ve been thinking a lot about how I’ve changed since we’ve met, moving away from the beauty standard — the big ones are that I’ve stopped dyeing my hair, plucking my brows, and shaving my legs. I stopped doing all these things as I’ve evolved, and gotten lazier, but I wonder if he feels cheated at all? Especially because the women in one circle of friends are always decked out to the nines. They’ll get up before the menfolk to put their makeup on.

At least according to me! Such a random funny thing to find out I was doing “wrong.”

We had been dating since junior year of highschool, married after grad school, and will have been married for 6 years (I think) come this Saturday. Definitely a LTR. I don’t recall a hard cutoff in our relationship for hiding grooming/bodily functions. It was just gradual. Of course since we started dating in highschool I would imagine that the progression was a little different from a strictly adult relationship.

Interesting that most of the comments here are from people in LTRs. As we get secure, sure, we think “well, he farts, I fart, whatevs…”, but in those early days? When is it okay to let ‘er rip?

How do you establish the shift from dating, to sexual intimacy, to everyday bodily intimacy? Do you see those things as tests? “Okay, I accidentally burped, he laughed, we’re cool,” or “OMG HE TOTALLY FARTED GROSS!” or “OMG HE TOTALLY FARTED HE REALLY LIKES ME!”

Who is the gross-out gate-keeper, so to speak?

Things shift significantly once you a) move in together, b) have pets, and/or as Suzanne mentioned, c) have kids, because then you have to engage with other bodies, but when does your “best behavior” start to wear thin with a new person? And does it matter if you see them as a possible long-term prospect, or just a hook-up?

Susan, I’m also a picker. There’s a great deal of satisfaction to be had in squeezing my bloke’s back spots.

Likewise, showers, shaving (when I can be bothered, which is rarely due to laziness and in-growing hairs) and eyebrow plucking I will do in front of SOs, but I will not pee or poo with someone else in the bathroom.

I fart and burp with the SO around but fanny farts during sex make me squirm even though I know he has no issues with it, what with it being natural and all.