I’ve been having a lot of trouble writing lately. There are a lot of reasons why that’s the case. Some are philosophically defensible; others are not.
I complained of this affliction to a friend and they sent along a thing that was published at one of my favourite litblog sites this summer, The Rumpus, a thing I had missed at the time, which was probably good, because now was really the time I needed to read it. Here is my favourite paragraph, but you should read the whole thing:
We get the work done on the ground level. And the kindest thing I can do for you is to tell you to get your ass on the floor. I know it’s hard to write, darling. But it’s harder not to. The only way you’ll find out if you “have it in you” is to get to work and see if you do. The only way to override your “limitations, insecurities, jealousies, and ineptitude” is to produce. You have limitations. You are in some ways inept. This is true of every writer, and it’s especially true of writers who are 26. You will feel insecure and jealous. How much power you give those feelings is entirely up to you.
I love the first sentence:
I write like a girl. I write about my lady life experiences, and that usually comes out as unfiltered emotion, unrequited love, and eventual discussion of my vagina as metaphor.
Then I don’t “write like a girl.” I’ve actually had people tell me this — my writing doesn’t resonate with them because it’s a little too dry and cold, or too sarcastic; not enough “feeling.” Mostly I just stress over not being a good writer, period. I mean, the mechanics of putting words on paper in a meaningful manner. I’ve almost learned that my “good enough” probably is, and maybe not everyone is noticing those little mistakes I keep making, but it’s hard.
Writing has always been tough — either you don’t have the time, or the energy, or a place to do it, or what have you. I told myself this year I was going to get back into somehow, so I got more serious about blogging, and began writing whatever came to mind on my laptop on the train. Sometimes its blog posts, sometimes its stories, many times its just musings — but writing is not about what you write but how you write it. All the great ideas or interesting thoughts you have in your life don’t amount to much unless you commit them a medium. Even if I never have a single story or book published in my lifetime, I’ve at least left a body of work behind to mark who I was and what I tried to do.
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I needed that kick up the butt.. thanks Michelle!