As suggested by awesome regular reader and commenter rodriguez, and in honor (?) of that big nuptial to-do across the pond (since I guess the bride’s family crest–which doesn’t exist–needs to be integrated into the groom’s? IBTP.)
If you’re middle-class (at best, like Ms. Middleton and me) you’re gonna have to make one up out of whole cloth. So what would your coat of arms look like? You can take a gander at the various heraldic imagery at sites like these, and then decide what to choose, but they offer a pretty limited number of options.
Bars and stripes and rampant and couchant lions, oh my! Crests: the tattoos of the fancy, old-money set.
The shield up there is totally bogus of course, but the dragon seemed the closet thing to a harpy, and I thought a Latin translation of “Killer of Boners” was a totally klassy touch. If I were to do it from scratch and purely my choosing, I’d probably have to stick in a book, or a pen, and probably a 2-liter of Diet Coke, as my weapons of choice. And probably a cat. Or a dinosaur. Giving the finger.
So, for this week’s FFT: describe your personal coat of arms. I s’pose you could approach this seriously, if you wanted to, but don’t feel constrained. Pick your colors, your patterns, your animals, your icons, your slogan, whatevs.