Brian (5), Maggie (2), Anna (8), circa 1989
This passed June my brother and sister-in-law celebrated their wedding back in Michigan, and for the first time in a few years all three of the Cook siblings were in the same place at the same time.
It was too little time, really, because my siblings are kick-ass people and I miss being in closer geographic proximity. For the first 26 years of my life, with the exception of travel and the odd semester or year abroad, all three of us lived within 30 minutes’ drive of the home where we grew up (and where my parents still live). We all went to college relatively near home and were in an out of my parents’ house as a home base throughout that period. Even when we weren’t living under the same roof we’d meet for coffee or go to the movies or tap each other to help with fun shopping like the purchase of a new laptop. We traveled together even when it wasn’t, strictly speaking, a family vacation.
I’m not going to pretend we never got on each others’ nerves or fought (my parents would be quick to point out exactly how wrong I was), but we were, and continue to be, really good friends.
- Maggie (24), Brian (27), and Anna (30), June 2011
The thing is, since 2007 we’ve scattered to the four winds. I moved to Boston for graduate school in August of 2007 and the following January my brother and his wife (then girlfriend) relocated to Portland, Oregon. When my sister graduated from college she and her boyfriend moved down to Austin, Texas. We’re all settling into our own adult lives now and it’s hard (an frickin’ expensive!) to meet up in the same place at the same time. In short, it sucks.
So I thought it was time for a little sibling appreciation this evening. My grown-up sibs are just as awesome as the younger versions of themselves. My brother is a free-lance illustrator and one of the best middle school art teachers going. He and his wife Renee hosted a wedding this passed June that is the only wedding I have ever thought to myself “I will crib from this someday” about. My sister is a User Operations Analyist at Facebook, where she has been involved in developing new ways to filter out child pornography from the site. In addition, she has insisted on training her staff in human sexuality so that they are able to differentiate between stuff they find “icky” and actual non-consensual/illegal behavior and imagery.
What about you, Harpies? What cool things are your siblings (born or chosen) up to? Brag as you like in comments – the open mic is now open!
I’m fortunate to have an amazing younger brother. We’re eight years apart: I’m 27 and he’s 19. When I would get grounded as a kid, he’d go work on Mom and beg her to let me “go free.”
When I hit my teens and needed someone, he was too young to really talk to or confide in, but that changed when he hit his teens.
Ever since, he has been an invaluable confidant and friend. We love to quote movies back and forth (Clue and The Princess Bride are two of our favs), and we regularly hang out, get bubble tea (mmm, boba), and go on double dates with our significant others.
He’s also a drummer in a local hardcore metal band. He’s supremely talented. It’s funny — he’s very low-key and even apathetic about many things (unlike me, the perpetual activist), but he’s passionate about his drumming, and it shows. ^_^
Also, Anna, I think your siblings are cool. What Maggie’s doing is awesome, especially the part about separating out what’s “icky” from what’s actually illegal. And how cool would it be to do what Brian does: inspire youngsters by teaching art? Very awesome.
My sister’s a reference librarian at a liberal arts college. She’s in charge of their website and is a kick-ass instructor as well. In her free time, she tends a gorgeous yard and garden and travels around the world. We’re fortunate in that we’ve always been very close – even as kids we didn’t fight all that much.
My older sister is a kiddie-whisperer, aka 1st grade teacher’s assistant. She’s amazing with little ones. She has a genetic disorder that causes her a lot of pain and she had many surgeries when we were growing up. I’m in awe of how she manages to stay upbeat, kind, and happy while living with chronic pain and constant medical interventions. She also has a sweet husband and a happy marriage, which makes me happy.
My three little brothers are awesome dudes. Not to be all lookist, but they’re tall and very handsome. We call the oldest “Vinnie Chase” because he’s just a handsome, happy-go-lucky guy who rolls with his friends and enjoys life. He’s a professional cook and has an awesome Rottweiler pup who he rescued from a pound in Baltimore. My other two younger brothers are both undergrads at extremely prestigious universities that cost entirely too much money and aren’t as good as the state college I went to, but hey, I’m proud of them anyway. They’re both Middle East studies majors—one just spent the summer working for the NGA doing top-secret stuff and the other is living in Jordan right now studying Arabic. I’m super-proud of how globally-minded and engaged they are.
I have lots of brothers and sisters, and am glad (most of the time) that we’re related and I would choose to be their friends.
My older brother is an executive type in London, and we converse weekly there-abouts about everything. Growing up he was a fantastic older brother, and I was sad when he left.
My sister S runs her own business, which is incredibly successful. And I’m proud that she has found a way to do something that she is passionate about and juggle her family life.
My brother M, unfortunately died when he was young, but he was intelligent and smart and awefully cheeky.
My other sister S is finishing her undergraduate degree in exercise science, and I so can’t wait to see her employed by a team to take care of those exercise things. She’s also incredibly outgoing and easy to get along with, and is my NOK.
My sister A is studying nursing, and recently became an enrolled nurse. Now it’s onto become an RN. I’m happy the she too has found something that she is interested in and is pursuing with gusto. She is also my NOK as well.
Then there’s my youngest brother, another M, who is a chef, and I think pretty awesome. I will always remember reading to him when he was little.
We catch up intermittently because there’s some of us who are overseas, and interstate. The last time I caught up with some of the brothers and sisters, it was just like starting off from the last time we saw each other.
It’s so much fun to read about what everyone’s sibs are doing! Keep the warm and fuzzy coming, everyone
I have 2 younger brothers. When we were growing up, I was horrible to them. Not all the time, but I can remember quite a few violent fights. It’s amazing that they even speak to me today. I love them both dearly and am so proud of them.
One is 2 years younger than I am and is in the entertainment business in LA. He does indie stuff, and despite offers to go mainstream and work for a big company, he’s stuck to his vision. It’s remarkable to see someone choose their art over a fat paycheck, especially in that business.
One is 6 years younger than I am and moved to Dallas a number of years ago when his company promoted him. He is amazingly gifted with anything computer-related. He didn’t finish college, but he can master any piece of hardware or software that’s put in front of him.
They have been fantastic uncles to our 2 kids. I recently returned from a family vacation with Mr MM, our kids, my mom, and both brothers. Being with everyone is so rare for us, and it was just wonderful and way too short.
On a slight tangent, to this day whenever people speak of their brothers and sisters, I still wonder where’s the rest, and is that all of them. : D
It’s great to meet the families of harpies.
My little brother and I were best friends growing up, and while we don’t interact as much anymore, we’re still close. It’s funny – back when we spent so much time together, we seemed so different. He was super extroverted and always wanted me to come “do something” with him, whereas I was introverted and had to be begged repeatedly to go outside and play. In high school, he was a popular kid, an actor, and a ladies’ man; I was a shy nerd. Now that we spend so much time apart, though (my SO and I live in Connecticut; he and his SO live back home in Michigan), so many similarities of career path and mannerisms seem to have emerged (presumably, they were there all along).
Anyway, he is abundantly self-confident, he learns quickly, and he seems completely unfazed by people who are different from himself. I’m trans, and when I told him about it, he was just like “OK, cool. Sucks that you had to hide it for so long.” He is studying to be a high school English teacher, and I’m super proud of him for it. Good teachers rock.
My brother is living it up as a pharmacy technician and always has the best “omfg this fucking customer!!!” stories.
I have 4 siblings. As kids, there was lots of fighting and some closeness at times.
Once we all hit adulthood and settled we all pretty much enjoy each other as interesting people. We all went to the same University so we have that bond to talk about now that we are grown up.
My oldest brother (10 yrs older than me) started out doing management information systems, wearing a suit and flying all over the country. He settled down with his partner, and a few years later made a mid-career change to a union finish carpenter in Chicago. His partner runs his own financial planning business.
My sister (9 yrs older than me) started out in agricultural journalism. She did urban horticulture for grad school, then became a yoga teacher and did animal rescue. She eventually had 2 kids with her husband, and homeschools them. She is busy with them with 4-H, chickens, ponies, etc. She lives here in the Seattle area, 90 minutes away. My brother in law works at Boeing, he is the guy who keeps the airplane wings from icing up and causing the plane to crash.
My next oldest brother (5 yrs older than me) is the smartest of all of us, he has a degree in Dairy Science, and runs the family dairy farm in WI with my parents. He and his wife (a former teacher) have no kids. He is the jack of all trades, knowing how to do everything from program his computer, fix every sort of machinery, do vet care on a sick cow, and manage a small crew of workers.
My closest in age brother (2.5yrs older than me) has a PhD in paleobiology. He then got a master’s for science teaching. He worked at City College in NY, got fed up with the infighting, and now works as a professor and head of a research lab at Ohio State. He and his partner own a place in Brooklyn, and his partner works as a psychiatrist in NY. My brother flies home every week, and during the various months he is not needed at the Ohio campus.
Then there is me! I turn 40 this Jan, and it is freaking out the rest of the siblings. When the baby of the family turns 40, they know they are getting old
My sibs live all over, so we never get together all at once. All save my sister’s family were able to visit the farm last summer for my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary. It was cool to have all of us (and significant others) in one place.
There is one BroDork. He is three years older, and we were not friends as kids. Like, he fucking HATED me. And made a point of letting me know it. We were (for all kinds of reasons) interested in/good at many of the same things, so there was a lot of competition.
However, after he went away to college, and since then, we’ve become emotionally closer, as we’ve gotten geographically further away (Correlation or causation? You decide!). Just a few weeks ago he moved to England to continue to work for a US government satellite surveillance/analysis body. I don’t know really what he does and he honestly isn’t allowed to tell me much. Big brother is Big Brother!!!
But even if he’s The Man and therefore to be suspected, he’s also smart and well-read and and informed and thus socio-politically leftist, and he gardens and cooks and we like to eat and drink and be merry together when we can arrange visits, which are few and far between. He came out for my dissertation defense/birthday in April, which was SO fucking amazing. Although we can still lock horns (and how!), we can be proud of each other now, rather than competitive. It’s great.
He’s married to a cool lady who’s a poet and a teacher and they have three of most Scandinavian-looking children you’ve ever seen.
Also, he makes me laugh harder (like gasping, pee-your-pants laughing) than any other person in the world. Including the Dude.
Ha! This is the time of year when Big Sis Pie and I move from mutual appreciation society to familial lovefest as we both have our birthdays in September.
She taught me to read when I was a horrible, grumpy toddler as she learnt about ten minutes after starting school (and now has an enviable academic record). She has a damn useful job working in poverty alleviation and is wonderfully creative in her spare time.
She supports and inspires me every day, lets me call her ridiculous nicknames and willingly accompanies me to important cultural events and doesn’t tease me if they turn out to be so dreadful we have to leave in the interval.
I’m an only child and am quite envious of you all with great siblings. My hubby is one of eight kids and not close to any except his younger brother. Hope you all appreciate your sibs, you are very lucky to have them! My in-laws still treat my man like he is the ornery teenager he once was. He was a handful back then, but he’s 41 now, I wish they would treat him like the intelligent, wonderful man that he is. We live many states from all of them and rarely see them, so it’s doubtful the situation will change. Makes me sad. Seems like a waste not to be able to love and support your siblings and have theirs in return.
I’m an only child as well and my husband and his siblings have always had an iffy relationship for person reasons that I’d rather not explain in a comment. I enjoy reading about people who are very close with their siblings. Although I have a lot of friends with siblings, many aren’t close for a variety of reasons and some have even explained to me that they feel like only children at times.
That said, Anna, your sister seems amazing! Can I be proud of her from afar? And I love the photo of the three of you.
I have one brother who is three years younger. We had an adversarial relationship as children. We were nothing alike, he was cruel to me and I despised him in return. We’d have brief moments of playfulness but that was about it. We grew up in PA, and then I went to college in Boston, and he moved to Portland, OR.
As far as I can tell, he’s grown into a pretty cool dude. He didn’t go to college, although he took a few music classes out there. He works as a baker for a living and is really into the crunchy granola lifestyle. It’s so weird because as a kid he was all about sports and video games and made fun of my taste for 60′s music but now he’s all about farmer’s markets and second-hand clothes and poetry. Not that those are incompatible, but … I guess you’d have to know him?
Sadly I really only hear about this stuff through my mom and pictures. I haven’t seen him in about three years and we never “reconnected” or anything like that. I often feel like an only child. He doesn’t normally go to PA for holidays–he typically goes back during a less hectic travel month if he can come up with the money. I do hope he’ll make it home for Thanksgiving or Christmas soon, though.