As far as I can tell, he’s grown into a pretty cool dude. He didn’t go to college, although he took a few music classes out there. He works as a baker for a living and is really into the crunchy granola lifestyle. It’s so weird because as a kid he was all about sports and video games and made fun of my taste for 60′s music but now he’s all about farmer’s markets and second-hand clothes and poetry. Not that those are incompatible, but … I guess you’d have to know him?

Sadly I really only hear about this stuff through my mom and pictures. I haven’t seen him in about three years and we never “reconnected” or anything like that. I often feel like an only child. He doesn’t normally go to PA for holidays–he typically goes back during a less hectic travel month if he can come up with the money. I do hope he’ll make it home for Thanksgiving or Christmas soon, though.

That said, Anna, your sister seems amazing! Can I be proud of her from afar? And I love the photo of the three of you.

She taught me to read when I was a horrible, grumpy toddler as she learnt about ten minutes after starting school (and now has an enviable academic record). She has a damn useful job working in poverty alleviation and is wonderfully creative in her spare time.

She supports and inspires me every day, lets me call her ridiculous nicknames and willingly accompanies me to important cultural events and doesn’t tease me if they turn out to be so dreadful we have to leave in the interval.

However, after he went away to college, and since then, we’ve become emotionally closer, as we’ve gotten geographically further away (Correlation or causation? You decide!). Just a few weeks ago he moved to England to continue to work for a US government satellite surveillance/analysis body. I don’t know really what he does and he honestly isn’t allowed to tell me much. Big brother is Big Brother!!!

But even if he’s The Man and therefore to be suspected, he’s also smart and well-read and and informed and thus socio-politically leftist, and he gardens and cooks and we like to eat and drink and be merry together when we can arrange visits, which are few and far between. He came out for my dissertation defense/birthday in April, which was SO fucking amazing. Although we can still lock horns (and how!), we can be proud of each other now, rather than competitive. It’s great.

He’s married to a cool lady who’s a poet and a teacher and they have three of most Scandinavian-looking children you’ve ever seen.

Also, he makes me laugh harder (like gasping, pee-your-pants laughing) than any other person in the world. Including the Dude.

Once we all hit adulthood and settled we all pretty much enjoy each other as interesting people. We all went to the same University so we have that bond to talk about now that we are grown up.

My oldest brother (10 yrs older than me) started out doing management information systems, wearing a suit and flying all over the country. He settled down with his partner, and a few years later made a mid-career change to a union finish carpenter in Chicago. His partner runs his own financial planning business.

My sister (9 yrs older than me) started out in agricultural journalism. She did urban horticulture for grad school, then became a yoga teacher and did animal rescue. She eventually had 2 kids with her husband, and homeschools them. She is busy with them with 4-H, chickens, ponies, etc. She lives here in the Seattle area, 90 minutes away. My brother in law works at Boeing, he is the guy who keeps the airplane wings from icing up and causing the plane to crash.

My next oldest brother (5 yrs older than me) is the smartest of all of us, he has a degree in Dairy Science, and runs the family dairy farm in WI with my parents. He and his wife (a former teacher) have no kids. He is the jack of all trades, knowing how to do everything from program his computer, fix every sort of machinery, do vet care on a sick cow, and manage a small crew of workers.

My closest in age brother (2.5yrs older than me) has a PhD in paleobiology. He then got a master’s for science teaching. He worked at City College in NY, got fed up with the infighting, and now works as a professor and head of a research lab at Ohio State. He and his partner own a place in Brooklyn, and his partner works as a psychiatrist in NY. My brother flies home every week, and during the various months he is not needed at the Ohio campus.

Then there is me! I turn 40 this Jan, and it is freaking out the rest of the siblings. When the baby of the family turns 40, they know they are getting old

My sibs live all over, so we never get together all at once. All save my sister’s family were able to visit the farm last summer for my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary. It was cool to have all of us (and significant others) in one place.

Anyway, he is abundantly self-confident, he learns quickly, and he seems completely unfazed by people who are different from himself. I’m trans, and when I told him about it, he was just like “OK, cool. Sucks that you had to hide it for so long.” He is studying to be a high school English teacher, and I’m super proud of him for it. Good teachers rock.

It’s great to meet the families of harpies.

One is 2 years younger than I am and is in the entertainment business in LA. He does indie stuff, and despite offers to go mainstream and work for a big company, he’s stuck to his vision. It’s remarkable to see someone choose their art over a fat paycheck, especially in that business.

One is 6 years younger than I am and moved to Dallas a number of years ago when his company promoted him. He is amazingly gifted with anything computer-related. He didn’t finish college, but he can master any piece of hardware or software that’s put in front of him.

They have been fantastic uncles to our 2 kids. I recently returned from a family vacation with Mr MM, our kids, my mom, and both brothers. Being with everyone is so rare for us, and it was just wonderful and way too short.