NN is right. We cannot engage these people in any productive way. We can talk publicly about our abortions or publicly support those who do. We can pressure our politicians as relentlessly as the antis do, and more. We can support our clinics and, if we’re so minded, volunteer as clinic escorts. All of those will get us a lot farther than arguing with fanatics who aren’t even listening to what we say.

I had thought long and hard about the title. I didn’t want to piss anyone off and tried to middle-ground it a bit. I knew that some people wouldn’t be offended and others would be, and I already hacked enough of the original piece because Mr. Ellert spent WAY too long defending his use of the word (going into ‘doth protest too much’ territory) so I decided to keep it in, albeit censored so I could try and have it all ways. This has obviously backfired in a way I should have expected and in a way that I didn’t and, quite frankly, pisses me off even though it’s still really my fault.

First, I am so sorry that I made people uncomfortable with the title and I should have trusted my better instincts and kept it out entirely. As the editor of the piece, this is my responsibility. I do strive to do better in these spaces and I do depend on your feedback for ways that I can improve. When in doubt, just don’t.

Second, judging by the absolutely rude and condescending comment left by Mr. Ellert still awaiting moderation (mostly because I haven’t decided whether or not I want to just throw him to the wolves), it didn’t please him either. Not enough ‘cunt’ for his taste. See, that was the most important piece to him so not having enough of it apparently gives him license to basically mock the readership with the same basic “you’re too sensitive/lemme teach you how writing works” crap we could get on an MRA website. It also apparently chaps his ass that he doesn’t know how moderation works since he, someone who never posted here before has to OMG WAIT HIS TURN TO BE APPROVED over Nefarious Newt who was approved to post a LONG LONG time ago. So, obviously, we’re awful people taking his cunt away and having to make him wait like every other first time commenter. I fucking LOVE allies like this, hard.

Needless to say, I should have vetted Mr. Ellert way more than I did before even before deciding to post his work. It was absolutely sloppy of me not to check him out and see how he would interact with others and how he would take criticism in a feminist space. Being rude to our readership and trying to disguise it as ‘dialogue’ is a huge no go from me, so I can’t imagine why someone would actively trash you guys and then have the audacity to wonder why their shit isn’t posted STAT. I will leave it up to you guys if you want me to post his comment so you can appropriately have a ‘dialogue’ with him.

In the end, the blame should fall on me and me alone. I accept all responsibility for this debacle and I do sincerely apologize for all of this. It’s under my name and I said yes to it.

As for Mr. Ellert? Don’t hold your breath.

Second, I’ve heard this a thousand times, and while the idea is sound, the fact is: it isn’t going to work. Period. These people are irrational. The pro-/anti-choice “debate” simply can’t be a debate. For there to be debate, both sides have to agree to the terms. That will never happen with the anti-choice crowd. They operate by using irrational fear and obfuscation; any attempt to legislate away their advantage and they take their aborted fetus pictures and go home.

This is the same mentality that got Galileo locked up for revealing the facts about the universe, that caused Copernicus to publish his findings about a heliocentric solar system after he died. This is the same mentality that took Joan of Arc, after her stunning liberation of so much of France, and burned her at the stake. This is the mentality that told people in Salem, Massachusetts that there were witches in their town, possessing young girls. You can’t fight that mentality with rational debate.

We simply have to outlast them. We simply have to be more vocal than they are. We simply have to take our side of the argument to the undecided and wavering and show them how rational our side is compared to theirs. And we have to hope that eventually, their mentality will slowly die out. We have a long wait ahead of us.

And it’s not that the blog can’t have flaws, but part of having a feminist blog is about recognizing mistakes and correcting them. So I hope that guest poster David Ellert will understand what he did wrong there, apologize, and do better from here on.